谁知道爱尔克的灯光的传说

Minos was king of Crete, and the first ruler to control the Mediterranean Sea, which he ridded of pirates.. He had with him a famed craftsman, Daedalus the Athenian, who was in exile from Athens because he had murdered his nephew (and somewhat too talented apprentice), Talos. Daedalus enjoyed much favor at the court, but he managed to fall from grace by accommodating the queen, Pasiphaë, in a request.

迈诺斯(Minos)是克里特岛的国王，也是第一个赶走海盗而控制地中海的领导者。在他的身边有一个非常著名的工艺巧匠，叫做戴德勒斯(Daedalu)。戴德勒斯(Daedalu)是个雅典人，因谋杀自己的侄儿泰洛斯(Talos)(和许多有才能的学徒)而遭流放。而戴德勒斯(Daedalu)在皇宫中非常吃香，一直到他和皇后法西菲(Pasiphaë)串通才逐渐失宠。

Minos had boasted that the gods would grant him any wish; he made all the preparations for a sacrifice to Poseidon, then prayed that a bull would emerge from the sea. Miraculously, a beautiful white bull swam ashore. Minos admired it so much that he decided to keep it, and sacrificed a different one from his herd instead.

迈诺斯(Minos)吹嘘众神会准予他任何的愿望。他开始准备所需的祭拜品来膜拜海神波塞顿(Poseidon)，而且祈祷海上将会出现一头牛。奇迹似的，竟然真有一头美丽的白牛从海上游到岸边。迈诺斯(Minos)非常喜欢这只牛而且想要拥有它，所以就献祭出另外一只畜牲来换取它。

This unwise decision annoyed Poseidon, who avenged the insult by causing queen Pasiphaë to fall madly in love with the white bull. Her request to Daedalus was that he should help her consummate this passion. He did so by building an ingenious hollow wooden cow, covered with hide and with a door on top through which she could lower herself inside. Together, they wheeled it into the pasture where the bull was kept; Daedalus helped her get in, and then discreetly withdrew. Pasiphaë was completely satisfied, but to everyone's horror, she then bore the Minotaur, a creature with a man's body but a bull's head.

这个愚昧的举动却惹恼了海神波塞顿(Poseidon)，於是决定报复这个屈辱，於是便使皇后法西菲(Pasiphaë)神经错乱去爱上这头白牛。当皇后因爱这头白牛而无可自拔时，她央求戴德勒斯(Daedalu)帮她和渡过一夜的激情。於是乎，戴德勒斯(Daedalu)打造了一个栩栩如生的木制空心母牛，以东西掩盖并在母牛上开了一个小门，好让皇后能够藏身其中。到了暗夜，他们将这木制母牛推送到白牛所在的牧草地上，戴德勒斯(Daedalu)先让皇后进入母牛身中，才小心翼翼的离开。在一夜的热情过后，皇后竟怀了米诺托尔(Minotaur)，也就是这只牛头人身的怪物。

Minos, annoyed in turn, sent to the oracle at Delphi to discover how he could hide this evidence of the shame to the royal family. The oracle answered that he ought to have Daedalus build a suitable cage; Minos thereupon had Daedalus build the Labyrinth, an enormous maze, and placed the Minotaur at the center of it. Minos also arranged to sacrifice young men and women to the flesh-eating Minotaur by shutting them into the Labyrinth, where they would wander, hopelessly lost, until the Minotaur caught and devoured them.

当迈诺斯(Minos)知道这个消息之后大为震怒，并写信问在戴尔非(Delphi)的神谕处寻问他该如何隐藏这个皇家的耻辱。神谕处便告知他要戴德勒斯(Daedalu)建造一个合适的牢笼来关住米诺托尔(Minotaur)。往后迈诺斯(Minos)便固定安排牺牲一群年轻的男女，将他们推入牢笼中的迷宫，让他们在其中迷失、漫游而感到无助，最后便被米诺托尔(Minotaur)捉到而吃掉。

One of Minos's (fully human) sons by Pasiphaë was Androgeus, who visited Athens to compete in the All-Athenian games, where he won every contest. King Aegeus knew that Androgeus was in contact with his internal enemies, the sons of Pallas, and was afraid that he might persuade his father, Minos, to intervene on their behalf. Therefore, he laid an ambush for the young man with the help of the Megareans. After a fierce battle, in which he fought very bravely, Androgeus was killed.

迈诺斯(Minos)有一个和皇后法西菲(Pasiphaë)所生的儿子叫安卓吉斯(Androgeus)。有一次他为了参加雅典的竞技而来到了雅典，并赢得许多的比赛。但另一方面，爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王得知安卓吉斯(Androgeus)和他内部的敌人，也就是佩洛斯(Pallas)的儿子有联系。并且害怕安卓吉斯(Androgeus)会说服他爸爸诺迈斯(Minos)介入他们利益纠葛之间。所以在迈格瑞恩斯(Megareans)的帮助之下，安排了一场突袭安卓吉斯(Androgeus)的战斗。不幸的是，安卓吉斯(Androgeus)则在这场激烈的战斗中受英勇表现的迈格瑞恩斯(Megareans)所杀而牺牲了。

When Minos heard of the death of his son, he became enraged, and gathered a great fleet together to avenge the murder. Although he was the effective ruler of the Mediterranean, quite a few of the Greeks fought on the side of Athens, or stayed neutral. The refusal of Aeacus, the king of Aegina, to join the Cretans was particularly galling to Minos. With all of his power, though, Minos was unable to defeat the Greeks until, in exasperation, he called on the aid of Zeus to avenge Androgeus. Greece was hit by famine and earthquakes, and the oracle at Delphi advised the Athenians to satisfy any demands that Minos made in return for peace. The demand was for a tribute of seven youths and seven maidens to be given every nine years, as sacrifice to the Minotaur, to which the Athenians reluctantly agreed.

当诺迈斯(Minos)知道他儿子的死讯之时，感到格外的愤怒，於是聚集了强大的舰队展开报复，准备攻打爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王。但尽管迈诺斯(Minos)王是地中海中非常有影响力的领导者，却只有少部份的希腊部落愿意参与这场战争，其余多是保持中立。而正由於当时的爱吉纳(Aegina)王不愿加入迈诺斯(Minos)王的联盟，使这场仗打起来更为艰辛。迈诺斯(Minos)王在发动了所有的力量后，仍无法打败爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王。盛怒之下，便要求宙斯的帮忙替安卓吉斯(Androgeus)进行报仇。宙斯使希腊岛上的人民遭受饥荒以及地震的打击，不久便再也撑不下去。战败后，戴尔非(Delphi)的神谕处建议雅典人民全盘接受迈诺斯(Minos)王所做的任何要求以换取和平，包括每九个年头就要贡献者七个各七个年轻男女做为米诺托尔(Minotaur)的牺牲品，而雅典人则在非常不甘心的情况下只有同意。

Some time after this war, king Aegeus consulted with the oracle at Delphi on another problem: although he had been married twice, he had no children. She gave him a wineskin, and told him not to open it before he got home, or he would die one day of grief - an oracle which was difficult to interpret.

在战争的结束后不久，爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王寻问戴尔非(Delphi)的神谕处另一个问题：即使他已经结过两次婚了，为什麼他仍然没有孩子？神谕处给了爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王一个装酒用皮袋，并告诉他在回家前打开这个袋子，否则他有一天将会痛苦而死，而实际的原因连神谕处也无法说明。

On his way back to Athens, he spent a night enjoying the hospitality of his friend, king Pittheus of Troezen. Pittheus's daughter, Aethra, was betrothed to Bellerophon, but he had been banished to Caria in disgrace, and she had little hope of his return. Feeling pity for her enforced virginity, and somewhat influenced by the wineskin that Aegeus had imprudently opened, he sent his equally drunk friend to Aethra's bed; in the middle of the night, she was also visited by Poseidon.

当爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王回到雅典时，他受到了好友-比特休斯(Pittheu)王 一夜热情的招待。比特休斯(Pittheu)的女儿艾斯菈(Aethra)曾和贝勒罗芬(Bellerophon)订过婚，但贝勒罗芬(Bellerophon)却因蒙受耻辱而被放逐到卡丽亚，艾斯菈(Aethra)也对他的回来不怀太多希望。爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王对於她的遭遇和贞洁受禁感到可惜，并在喝下酒袋中酒的影响下，爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)强行闯进艾斯菈(Aethra)的闺房。而在同一天的半夜里，海神波塞顿(Poseidon)也来”拜访”了艾斯菈(Aethra)。

In the morning, when Aegeus awoke next to her, he told her that, if a son were born to her, she should raise him without divulging his paternity, in case the sons of Pallas should attempt to murder the boy as a blow to the royal house of Athens. When a son was duly born, Aethra named him Theseus and, although she was uncertain of his exact paternity, she raised him as she had been instructed.

到了早上，当爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王在艾斯菈(Aethra)身边醒过来的时候，他告诉她：如果她怀了他的孩子，就将孩子好好扶养长大，并且不要告诉任何人他们的父子关系，以免佩洛斯(Pallas)的儿子企图谋杀这个孩子，来打击雅典的皇室。当这个孩子安全的生下来后，艾斯菈(Aethra)给他取名做 。而尽管她并不知道这孩子真正的父亲是谁，她仍遵造当初的指示将他好好的扶养长大。

When he was old enough, she took him to a large rock, to see if he could lift it. He was able to do so, and underneath it he found a sword and a pair of sandals left there for him by Aegeus. He took these items, and set off for Athens.

当这孩子长到一定的年纪以后，她带这个孩子找到了一块大石块，并要他试著去举起。塞席尔斯(Theseus)在抬起这块石头之后发现，原来石块底下留有爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)给他的一把剑和一双凉鞋。他拿起这些东西，并且离开了雅典。

He decided to take the overland route, which was infested with bandits, rather than the safer sea passage, to prove himself. On the way, not too surprisingly, he met with many adventures, and had a suitable number of close calls. When he arrived, he was nearly poisoned by Medea, who had taken refuge with Aegeus after her various crimes in Corinth. She had had a son by Aegeus, and when she recognized who Theseus was, she convinced Aegeus to offer him a cup of wine laced with wolfsbane. He was just about to drink it when Aegeus noticed the sword that he carried, and intervened.

塞席尔斯(Theseus)决定跋涉过大批强盗出没的陆路，而不选择较安全的海路，以证明自己的能力。当然，在路途中他经历了不少的危险，而且都在千钓一发之际逃过一劫。只是当他真正回到了爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王的地方时，却差点被美迪雅(Medea)毒死。美迪雅(Medea)是当初在科林斯(Corinth)犯下太多罪过的时候，和爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)一起避难而来的，并和爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)有了一个儿子。当美迪雅(Medea)认出塞席尔斯(Theseus)时，就劝服爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王逼迫塞席尔斯(Theseus)喝下一杯含毒的药酒，直到爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王认出了那把剑的同时，及时的阻止了这个行动。

There was great rejoicing in Athens, but Medea had to flee for her life, and Pallas and his sons were not happy. They began a rebellion, but were crushed by Aegeus's forces under the command of Theseus.

因为塞席尔斯(Theseus)的回来，雅典举国欢迎，而美迪雅(Medea)则开始策划逃命。同时，佩洛斯(Pallas)和他的儿子也非常的不高兴，并为此决定策动谋反，最后却在塞席尔斯(Theseus)下达的命令下遭爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)的军队镇压而失败。

However, the joy did not last. Minos's tribute came due, and as the ship approached, the seven youths and seven maidens had to prepare to leave. Theseus was so touched by the spectacle of grief that this preparation aroused that he volunteered to lead the group himself, promising the families of the others who would go with him that he would bring them all back alive. Naturally, Aegeus was not eager to allow his recently discovered son and heir to depart on so dangerous a task, but Theseus insisted, promising to hoist a white sail upon his return, rather than the usual black one, to signal his father that he was returning safely.

然而，这场欢愉并没有持续下去。雅典约定要给予迈诺斯(Minos)王的贡赎的日子已经到了，而在使船接近的同时，14个年轻男女必须准备好。塞席尔斯(Theseus)对这个情境感到相当的悲痛，并决定起身号招一群人和他一起到迈诺斯(Minos)王那边，并且对这些人的家属承诺会让每一个人都平安的活著回来。但是很自然的，爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)王并不同意让重新回到身边的未来继承人去冒这个险。而塞席尔斯(Theseus)却坚持完成，并承诺其父亲如果他能安全的活著回来，就舍弃原来的黑色帆布，改升吊起白色的帆布以告知父亲喜讯。

The ship left for Crete with Theseus and thirteen other Athenians aboard - two of the "maidens" were actually feminine-looking young men who could pass for girls when they dressed the part. When they arrived in port, Minos himself came down to see them, and threw his signet ring into the harbor, challenging Theseus to prove that he was the son of Poseidon by retrieving it. This task Theseus accomplished, aided by dolphins and Neriads.

船就这样起程前往克里特岛，而船上共有塞席尔斯(Theseus)和其余的十三的年轻男女。但实际上，其中两个妙龄”处女”，却是两个装扮看似女生的男人。当船到了港口，迈诺斯(Minos)王亲自来迎接这一群人，并将他的图章戒指直接丢入港口中。他想考验塞席尔斯(Theseus)，要他想办法找回这枚戒指，以证明他是海神波塞顿(Poseidon)的儿子。而塞席尔斯(Theseus)在靠著海豚和奈瑞尔德斯文(Neriads)的帮助之下，顺利的完成了任务。

As Theseus emerged from the water, Minos's daughter, Ariadne, who had accompanied her father to see the arrival of the ship, fell instantly in love with him. She determined to help him, and enlisted the aid of the ubiquitous Daedalus, who came up with the idea of using a ball of string to trace the way into, and back out of, the Minotaur's lair.

迈诺斯(Minos)的女儿艾瑞妮(Ariadne)，为了看使船的回来而陪伴在迈诺斯(Minos)的身边。当她看到塞席尔斯(Theseus)在找回戒指而浮出水面的那一刻，便马上深深的爱上了他。她决心要帮助塞席尔斯(Theseus)，便寻求万能的戴德勒斯(Daedalu)的助力。戴德勒斯(Daedalu)想到了一个方法，是使用一条线串著小球，来追踪并记下进出米诺托尔(Minotaur)迷宫的路径。

Armed with a sword supplied by Ariadne, Theseus entered the Labyrinth, worked his way to the very center, and found and killed the Minotaur. When he emerged, dripping with blood, Ariadne embraced him. The others had managed to escape from their prison - the youths disguised as women had killed the guards in the women's quarters - and they all met in a rendevous. They made their way to the harbor and stole the ship in which they had been brought to Crete, but the alarm was raised, and they had to fight their way out.

艾瑞妮(Ariadne)送给了塞席尔斯(Theseus)一把配剑，让他带进迷宫去。而塞席尔斯(Theseus)藉著许多的帮助到达了迷宫的中心，并且找到和杀死米诺托尔(Minotaur)。当他走出迷宫的时候，身上仍淌著血，而艾瑞妮(Ariadne)高兴的拥抱著他，其他的人则开始计划如何逃跑。两名男拌女装的年轻人杀了女人帐营的警卫，并且得到了酬赏。他们想办法逃到了港口边，并且偷了一艘船准备离开克里特岛，但却引起了警报，而必须战斗以寻求一条生路。

As they made their way north towards Athens, they stopped at the island of Naxos. There, for reasons that remain obscure, Theseus left Ariadne behind - an act that is hard to describe as creditable to his reputation. She later became the bride of Dionysus, and bore him many children, but at first she was in a poor mood, and cursed Theseus.

当他们驶向北方往雅典而去，在中途停留在一个那克索斯(Naxos)的岛屿上。因为岛上的环境十分的偏僻幽暗，而在路途中塞席尔斯(Theseus)留下了艾瑞妮(Ariadne)，而造成他未来辉煌的名声来说，一个非常讽刺的污点之一。艾瑞妮(Ariadne)最后成了酒神戴奥尼索斯(Dionysus)的未婚妻，且为他生了许多的孩子，但在被抛弃的一开始，她心情非常的沮丧，痛恨并诅咒塞席尔斯(Theseus)。

The curse was almost instantly fulfilled, for Theseus forgot to change his sail from black to white. As the ship pulled in to port, Aegeus, seeing the black sail, assumed the worst, and lept from a precipice to his death in the sea that still bears his name.

当时的诅咒马上便实现了，因为塞席尔斯(Theseus)忘了改换黑色帆布为白色。当他们的船一进港口，爱吉尔斯(Aegeus)一看见黑色的帆布却以为恶讯的传来，失望之余，从断崖上跳海自尽。而现今当地便是以他为名。

Meanwhile, back in Crete, Minos finally discovered who had aided Pasiphaë in her debauchery, and for a brief time Daedalus and his son, Icarus, were imprisoned in the Labyrinth as well. However, Pasiphaë managed to get them released, and the father and son decided to leave Crete altogther. Since the harbors were watched, Daedalus fashioned artificial wings out of bird feathers; the larger ones were stitched, and the smaller held in place by wax.

在此同时，在克里特岛上的迈诺斯(Minos)王也发现了当初是谁帮助皇后法西菲(Pasiphaë)做出纵情放荡的行为，於是将戴德勒斯(Daedalu)和他的儿子艾克尔斯(Icarus )一起关进迷宫里一小时间。然而，皇后法西菲(Pasiphaë)一直设法要帮助他们脱逃，这对父子也决定一起离开克里特岛。由於港口早已遭到严格的监视，戴德勒斯(Daedalu)便由鸟儿的羽毛来编造出两对人工翅膀；较大的以缝线编结而成，而较小的则以腊油黏结。

Before they took off, Daedalus warned his son not to fly too low, or the sea foam would wet the feathers and drag him down, nor to fly too high, or the sun would melt the wax, with much the same effect - "Follow me!" were his final words to the boy. They flew north, past Naxos, Delos, and Paros, and then Icarus got carried away with the delight of flying, and soared as high as he could go. The wax melted, and the boy tumbled into the sea and drowned close by the island of Icaria, which still bears his name

在他们离开之前，戴德勒斯(Daedalu)警告他的儿小不要飞的太低，不然海面上的泡沫会浸湿羽毛而使他们掉落，但也不能飞得太高，不然太阳会溶化腊，而遭到同样的下场。”跟著我”是他最后提醒他儿子所说的话。他们飞越北方的那克索斯(Naxos)、迪洛斯(Delos)和派洛斯(Paros)。然而随著愈飞愈远，艾克尔斯(Icarus )则愈感到兴奋，便渐渐的飞行到他尽可能的高度。不幸的是，羽毛上的腊开始溶化，艾克尔斯(Icarus )则瞬间跌落到一个小岛的附近海域上。(传说这个岛因此而得名)

Daedalus continued on, making his way eventually to Camicus in Sicily, where he was welcomed by king Cocalus. Meantime, Minos determined to retrieve his master craftsman, and raised a fleet to find him. He needed to discover the whereabouts of the artisan, and he did so by proclaiming a huge prize everywhere he went for anyone who could draw a linen thread through the convolutions of a triton shell. Once the fleet was in Sicily, and he heard of the prize, Daedalus could not resist winning it. He did so by fastening a gossamer thread to an ant, and entering it into the shell through a hole that he had bored in the end, meantime smearing the open end of the shell with honey so that the ant would weave its way through to the source of the scent. He then tied the linen thread to the gossamer, and drew it through in turn.

戴德勒斯(Daedalu)忍著悲伤继续飞行，直到西西里岛上的卡米克斯(Camicus)。在那里，他受到可卡勒斯(Cocalus)王的欢迎。同时，迈诺斯(Minos)王回想起他的工艺技师戴德勒斯(Daedalu)，并派出一艘舰队去寻找他。他为了得到工艺师戴德勒斯(Daedalu)的下落，每到一个地方便宣称是否有人能够将一条细线穿过回旋的梭尾螺壳中，并为此提供高额的奖金。当有一次迈诺斯(Minos)王的舰队到了西西里岛，而戴德勒斯(Daedalu)也听闻了这个消息，便开始无法抗拒奖金的诱惑。於是他设计将细蛛线先缚在一只蚂蚁身上，把它放入一端出口，再於另一端出口涂抹蜂蜜，使蚂蚁循著香味出来。最后再将蛛线和亚麻线连在一起，并慢慢的拉穿过整个贝壳。

As soon as Minos knew that the the prize had been claimed, he knew where Daedalus was, and he made war on the Sicilians, defeating them. While he bathed in the palace at Camicus, though, the daughters of Cocalus, with the help of Daedalus, killed him by pouring boiling water on him through a cleverly fashioned vent above the tub. He joined his brother Rhadamanthys and his old enemy Aeacus in Hades, where they were made judges of the dead. Daedalus eventually moved on, and ended his days in Sardinia.

当迈诺斯(Minos)王知道有人解开任务得到赏金的同时，他就知道戴德勒斯(Daedalu)原来藏身在哪。於是他开始对西西里发动战争，并且打败他们。而当他沐浴在卡米克斯(Camicus)的宫殿之中时，可卡勒斯(Cocalus)的女儿，靠著戴德勒斯(Daedalu)的帮助，将滚烫的热水藉由木桶上的漏孔倾倒入内而杀死了迈诺斯(Minos)王。最后戴德勒斯(Daedalu)在哈迪斯(Hades)遇见了他的兄弟雷达曼西斯(Rhadamanthys)和他的老敌人爱尔克斯(Aeacus)，并且一起评论那些已死之人。戴德勒斯(Daedalu)最后选择继续旅行流浪，而且在塞迪尼雅(Saedinia)结束了他的一生。

这个愚昧的举动却惹恼了海神波塞顿(Poseidon)，於是决定报复这个屈辱，於是便使皇后法西菲(Pasiphaë)神经错乱去爱上这头白牛。当皇后因爱这头白牛而无可自拔时，她央求戴德勒斯(Daedalu)帮她和渡过一夜的激情。於是乎，戴德勒斯(Daedalu)打造了一个栩栩如生的木制空心母牛，以东西掩盖并在母牛上开了一个小门，好让皇后能够藏身其中。到了暗夜，他们将这木制母牛推送到白牛所在的牧草地上，戴德勒斯(Daedalu)先让皇后进入母牛身中，才小心翼翼的离开。在一夜的热情过后，皇后竟怀了米诺托尔(Minotaur)，也就是这只牛头人身的怪物。

这是巴金的一篇散文。

爱尔克的灯光

傍晚，我靠着逐渐黯淡的最后的阳光的指引，走过十八年前的故居。这条街、这个建筑物开始在我的眼前隐藏起来，像在躲避一个久别的旧友。但是它们的改变了的面貌于我还是十分亲切。我认识它们，就像认识我自己。还是那样宽的街，宽的房屋。巍峨的门墙代替了太平缸和石狮子，那一对常常做我们坐骑的背脊光滑的雄狮也不知逃进了哪座荒山。然而大门开着，照壁上“长宜子孙”四个字却是原样地嵌在那里，似乎连颜色也不曾被风雨剥蚀。我望着那同样的照壁，我被一种奇异的感情抓住了，我仿佛要在这里看出过去的十九个年头，不，我仿佛要在这里寻找十八年以前的遥远的旧梦。

守门的卫兵用怀疑的眼光看我。他不了解我的心情。他不会认识十八年前的年轻人。他却用眼光驱逐一个人的许多亲密的回忆。

黑暗来了。我的眼睛失掉了一切。于是大门内亮起了灯光。灯光并不曾照亮什么，反而增加了我心上的黑暗。我只得失望地走了。我向着来时的路回去。已经走了四五步，我忽然掉转头，再看那个建筑物。依旧是阴暗中一线微光。我好像看见一个盛满希望的水碗一下子就落在地上打碎了一般，我痛苦地在心里叫起来。在这条被夜幕覆盖着的近代城市的静寂的街中，我仿佛看见了哈立希岛上的灯光。那应该是姐姐爱尔克点的灯吧。她用这灯光来给她的航海的兄弟照路。每夜每夜灯光亮在她的窗前，她一直到死都在等待那个出远门的兄弟回来。最后她带着失望进入坟墓。

街道仍然是清静的。忽然一个熟习的声音在我耳边轻轻地唱起了这个欧洲的古传说。在这里不会有人歌咏这样的故事。应该是书本在我心上留下的影响。但是这个时候我想起了自己的事情。

十八年前在一个春天的早晨，我离开这个城市、这条街的时候，我也曾有一个姐姐，也曾答应过有一天回来看她，跟她谈一些外面的事情。我相信自己的诺言。那时我的姐姐还是一个出阁才只一个多月的新嫁娘，都说她有一个性情温良的丈夫，因此也会有长久的幸福的岁月。

然而人的安排终于被“偶然”毁坏了。这应该是一个“意外”。但是这“意外”却毫无怜悯地打击了年轻的心。我离家不过一年半光景，就接到了姐姐的死讯。我的哥哥用了颤抖的哭诉的笔叙说—个善良女性的悲惨的结局，还说起她死后受到的冷落的待遇。从此那个作过她丈夫的所谓温良的人改变了，他往一条丧失人性的路走去。他想往上爬，结果却不停地向下面落，终于到了用鸦片烟延续生命的地步。对于姐姐，她生前我没有好好地爱过她，死后也不曾做过一样纪念她的事。她寂寞地活着，寂寞地死去。死带走了她的一切，这就是在我们那个地方的旧式女子的命运。

我在外面一直跑了十八年。我从没有向人谈过我的姐姐。只有偶尔在梦里我看见了爱尔克的灯光。一年前在上海我常常睁起眼睛做梦。我望着远远的在窗前发亮的灯，我面前横着一片大海，灯光在呼唤我，我恨不得腋下生出翅膀，即刻飞到那边去。沉重的梦压住我的心灵，我好像在跟许多无形的魔手挣扎。我望着那灯光，路是那么远，我又没有翅膀。我只有一个渴望：飞！飞！那些熬煎着心的日子！那些可怕的梦魇！

但是我终于出来了。我越过那堆积着像山一样的十八年的长岁月，回到了生我养我而且让我刻印了无数儿时回忆的地方。我走了很多的路。

十九年，似乎一切全变了，又似乎都没有改变。死了许多人，毁了许多家。许多可爱的生命葬入黄土。接着又有许多新的人继续扮演不必要的悲剧。浪费，浪费，还是那许多不必要的浪费——生命，精力，感情，财富，甚至欢笑和眼泪。我去的时候是这样，回来时看见的还是一样的情形。关在这个小圈子里，我禁不住几次问我自己：难道这十八年全是白费？难道在这许多年中间所改变的就只是装束和名词？我痛苦地搓自己的手，不敢给一个回答。

在这个我永不能忘记的城市里，我度过了五十个傍晚。我花费了自己不少的眼泪和欢笑，也消耗了别人不少的眼泪和欢笑。我匆匆地来，也将匆匆地去。用留恋的眼光看我出生的房屋，这应该是最后的一次了。我的心似乎想在那里寻觅什么。但是我所要的东西绝不会在那里找到。我不会像我的一个姑母或者嫂嫂，设法进到那所已经易了几个主人的公馆，对着园中的花树垂泪，慨叹着一个家族的盛衰。摘吃自己栽种的树上的苦果，这是一个人的本分。我没有跟着那些人走一条路，我当然在这里找不到自己的脚迹。几次走过这个地方，我所看见的还只是那四个字：“长宜子孙”。“长宜子孙”这四个字的年龄比我的不知大了多少。这也该是我祖父留下的东西吧。最近在家里我还读到他的遗嘱。他用空空两手造就了一份家业。到临死还周到地为儿孙安排了舒适的生活。他叮嘱后人保留着他修建的房屋和他辛苦地搜集起来的书画。但是儿孙们回答他的还是同样的字：分和卖。我很奇怪，为什么这样聪明的老人还不明白一个浅显的道理，财富并不“长宜子孙”，倘使不给他们一个生活技能，不向他们指示一条生活道路！“家”这个小圈子只能摧毁年轻心灵的发育成长，倘使不同时让他们睁起眼睛去看广大世界；财富只能毁灭崇高的理想和善良的气质，要是它只消耗在个人的利益上面。

“长宜子孙”，我恨不能削去这四个宇！许多可爱的年轻生命被摧残了，许多有为的年轻心灵被囚禁了。许多人在这个小圈子里面憔悴地捱着日子。这就是“家”！“甜蜜的家”！这不是我应该来的地方。爱尔克的灯光不会把我引到这里来的。

于是在一个春天的早晨，依旧是十八年前的那些人把我送到门口，这里面少了几个，也多了几个。还是和那次一样，看不见我姐姐的影子，那次是我没有等待她，这次是我找不到她的坟墓。一个叔父和一个堂兄弟到车站送我，十八年前他们也送过我一段路程。

我高兴地来，痛苦地去。汽车离站时我心里的确充满了留恋。但是清晨的微风，路上的尘土，马达的叫吼，车轮的滚动，和广大田野里一片盛开的菜子花，这一切驱散了我的离愁。我不顾同行者的劝告，把头伸到车窗外面，去呼吸广大天幕下的新鲜空气。我很高兴，自己又一次离开了狭小的家，走向广大的世界中去！

忽然在前面田野里一片绿的蚕豆和黄的菜花中间，我仿佛又看见了一线光，一个亮，这还是我常常看见的灯光。这不会是爱尔克的灯里照出来的，我那个可怜的姐姐已经死去了。这一定是我的心灵的灯，它永远给我指示我应该走的路。